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There is always only the present moment: let go of regrets and worries and be friends with the Now

The opportunities will never stop coming our way, so cast out the limiting beliefs you might have about your “boat already have been shipped” and all that nonsense.

There will always bee another one, many new opportunities, and they will be forever coming your way.

Sometimes, people tell me that it’s too late for them to do or experience something that they once thought of as a dream they wished to come true, because once someone came along and gave them something they thought of as an opportunity and they decided to pass for some reason and then they go about their lives and think that that was it, and because they didn’t take it, they don’t get anymore chances or opportunities.

What in fact happened was, that someone came along, presented this what they called an opportunity, and we didn’t feel it resonated with us, we might have felt that something was a bit off about the whole things so we said thank you but no thanks. What really happened was that we in fact trusted out gut feeling and made a decision based on our intuitions, and oftentimes we are totally unaware of the awesome thing that just happened.

We trusted our selves!

But often, sadly we think that that was the only opportunity there was for us in this lifetime, and we shut ourselves out of the flow of opportunities. They are still coming towards us but we don’t see them.

Especially if this person who came along keeps pitching for us how incredible this opportunity is and it is a a once in a life time thing. And yeah.., about that. There are no such things. It really is an everlasting flow going on and you pick the once that feels right to you and say no to all other things.

That’s really all there is to it. Go with what feels right and leave the rest – it might be right for someone else, but it doesn’t mean it’s the right thing for everyone.

What if…..

All the what ifs we state are only holding us back.

• “What if that really was the opportunity of a life time and I just ignored it?”

And even worse when that particular opportunity worked very well for someone else and they get really rich. We work ourselves up to the extent that sometimes people even feel like they don’t want to live anymore.

But let me tell you something. All the success you see other people having around you are clues and signs of your own success and if you could just celebrate with them you would have your own in no time!

Jealousy or envy only keeps you away from what you want and dream of, so let it go. Let go of self pity and stop thinking that good things only happens to others.

If you can be totally honest with yourself and examine exactly why you did turn that “once in a life time opportunity” down and find that you did it because it didn’t feel right to you, then you can be absolutely sure that it wasn’t right for you. You have to trust that, and then look for other opportunities instead of beating yourself up.

If you find that you said no to it because you were afraid of the process, afraid because you didn’t know how to do it, how to proceed or even how to afford it, then you have to work on your trust in yourself and open your eyes to other opportunities and be more bold in the future, because they are there for you, always.

Either way, stop beating yourself up for the choice you have made in the past!

When the next opportunity is in sight, dare to step out of your comfort zone and just seize it. If you’re totally honest with yourself, you know if you’re holding yourself back or if it is your intuition telling you that something is not right for you.

Sometimes something is not right for us at one time, and then later on it will be. Sometimes we jump into things without thinking only to find out later that it was completely wrong for us. Either way, it was all right for us at that particular moment in time, and there is a lesson to be learned. Maybe we needed that jump just so we could learn to check with our inner being more often in the future.

Time is always right for us, even when we think it was wrong. We all have had times in our lives when we have done something and years later we cringe by the thought of us doing that. But back then we did the best we could, with the self knowledge we had, just like we do today.

Hopefully we know better today, and make better choices for ourselves.

We will always evolve and what we think today will be very different of how and what we think about in ten years from now. However we think about it, it was the right thing for us at that time in our life, even if we think it would be wrong today. Just don’t linger in the past, and get back into this moment and make a new choice now, and now, and now.

And again now. Make the present moment count!

Many job candidates in the construction industry fail to negotiate when they receive an employment offer. Failure to engage in employment offer negotiations typically stems from an applicant’s lack of negotiation skills, fear of rejection, or worry that attempts to negotiate will anger a hiring manager. Construction and engineering professionals should arrive at the negotiating table armed with current salary data and a summary of their special skills. Below are five tips designed to help professionals in the construction and engineering industries successfully engage in employment offer negotiations.

1) Do your research. Arrive at the negotiating table armed with the latest statistics and salary trends in the construction or engineering industries. Make sure that the data you reference possesses the following attributes:

• Citing data from the past twelve months will help your case.
• Statistics and salary data that you cite should correspond to the position you seek and your qualifications.
• Cite data from credible sources such as the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics

2) Have your brag book on hand. Do not be afraid to remind employers of your accomplishments, awards, and notable projects you managed. You should also reference any contributions you have made to your local community. Summarize your professional achievements and activities in an organized format that will delight employers and enhance your odds of securing your dream offer.

3) Highlight your special skills and certifications. When you negotiate for additional compensation or job-related perks, you need to be ready to justify your value as an employee. Examples of relevant certifications or special skills that would help your negotiation efforts include the following:

• Certified Construction Manager (CCM)
• Certified Professional Construction Certification (CPCC)
• Construction Engineering Certification

4) Be prepared to compromise. Ideally, you will succeed with your negotiations. However, there is a chance that an employer will reject your request or present a counteroffer. Remember to respond gracefully regardless of the news that you receive.

5) Follow up. It is unlikely that you will receive a confirmed offer immediately after you finish negotiating with a potential employer. In most cases, hiring managers will require time to finalize a decision and prepare an updated offer. In the interim, follow up with the employer to express your appreciation for considering your request.

Do not enter employment offer negotiations without a strategic plan. By following the tips above, you can increase your odds of success at the negotiating table and receiving the employment offer that you deserve.

1. Preparation. Preparation. Preparation.

2. Rehearse. Rehearse. Rehearse.

3. Ask someone whom you trust to give you feedback on your presentation ahead of time.

4. Ask for the feedback to be specific, focusing in on commendations, recommendations and commendations preferably in that order.

5. In preparation, write down everything you want to say – without censorship.

6. Cluster what you consider to be the salient points and build your speech around these.

7. Present your speaking, life and work credentials very early on. This helps to build credibility.

8. Speak persuasively and authoritatively. The audience is coming to listen to you because they believe you have the answers.

9. Use interesting transitions that take you from one point to the next.

10. Create visual images with your words, remember the old adage; ‘a picture paints a thousand words’.

11. Speak clearly, annunciating appropriately.

12. Speak enthusiastically, if you’re not enthusiastic, why
should the audience be?

13. Start with a ‘big bang’ opening – something your audience will remember.

14. Close your speech with a call to action. What do you want your audience to do, say or think as a result of hearing your speech?

15. Research your audience. Who are they? What do they want to know? What do they know already? How large is the audience?

16. Find out what types of questions you might be expected to respond to.

17. Prepare answers to questions.

18. Deal with hostile questions by staying calm, receiving the question from the questioner and presenting the answer to the whole audience. Make sure you don’t get into a two way dialogue.

19. If using visual aids, make sure that they are in appropriate working order, check this ahead of time and certainly make sure they are checked on the day, ahead of your speech.

20. Make sure you project your voice appropriately to the size of the audience and the room.

21. Use a microphone as appropriate, there’s nothing worse for the voice than continually putting a strain on it.

22. Ensure you have appropriate inflections, no one wants to listen to a monotone voice

23. Pace your speech, not too fast, not too slow.

24. Avoid the use of jargon, unless you know your audience understands that jargon.

25. Decide what it is you want to do with your speech; entertain, persuade, inform etc.

26. Build rapport with your audience. Speak, using a number of representational systems: visual, auditory, kinaesthetic. This will ensure you are bringing most of the audience along with you most of the time.

27. The general format of a speech is: tell the audience what you will tell them, tell them and conclude by telling them that you have told them.

28. It’s usually best to take questions at the end of a speech, each time you allow questions you lose control of the ‘floor’.

29. Determine how long you will speak for and stay within
that time frame.

30. A speech lasting much more than 45 minutes will have much of your audience asleep.

31. Get your audience’s attention from the outset with a quote, a story, a statistic, a joke, an anecdote etc.

32. If you can, it’s best to have nothing between you and your audience.

33. If you wish though, ‘cue’ cards are acceptable to help you remember the key points you wish to make.

34. Join a speaking club such as Toastmasters International – a great learning ground for fledgling speakers.

35. Control your nerves with diaphramic breathing.

36. Be mindful of inappropriate body language – fidgeting for example will take people away from the speech.

37. Dress appropriately for your audience and for your own comfort.

38. Pause appropriately, a well timed pause adds intrigue and draws your audience in and is better than the ubiquitous uhmmmmmmmms and ahhhhhh’s.

39. Have a glass of water handy, for the potential dry mouth syndrome – take sips during pauses, rather than gulp.

40. In order to combat shortness of breath it’s best to inhale and then speak on the out breath. This may feel a little strange at first and gets better with practice.

41. Prior to speaking it makes sense not to consume alcohol unless you want to risk inarticulation and muddled ideas.

42. Be aware that milk causes mucous and so may make you nasaly, here again you might want to think about what liquid you intake prior to a speech.

43. Ahead of your speaking in public take a few moments to scan the audience, this gives the added benefit of enabling you to relax prior to beginning.

44. If speaking humorously, remember this really must be done with confidence or you could go down like a lead balloon.

45. A humorous speech has a number of benefits: acts as an ice-breaker, could win over a hostile audience, keep people interested and helps them to remember what you have said.

46. Use a range of resources to build your speech: books, magazines, current and historical news stories, movies, tapes, internet, themes from your own life and those around you.

47. Engage with the audience’s own experiences, use information that they have given you during the question process.

48. Leave the audience satisfied, wanting more and wishing to hear from you again.

49. At the end of your speech undertake a self-evaluative review: what went well in the presentation? What could you do differently? How effective overall was the speech?

50. Please create your own list of tools for effective public speaking.

If you feel your friends, relatives or colleagues may benefit from this information I would be really happy and grateful if you could forward this article to them. Many thanks.